When the Shy Guy inherits the Earth

The meek shall inherit the earth. Some day. One supposes. When all that can have been said has been said. When all cocktail parties shall have long lapsed into the awkward silence that is the domain of the tongue tied. When the reign of the People Persons shall have ended. Until such a day, the only-too eager conversation of the glib talker will continue to seal over the pause that might have been the shy guy’s only chance to make that degree, clinch that deal, get his girl, and generally alter the course of his life.

Right from the bespectacled teacher shrewdly observing pre-primary interviewees for signs of garrulousness, for ‘eye-contact’, and ‘ability to communicate with peers’, ‘ability to communicate with adults’ etc, etc; to the esteemed panelist on the IIM–A GD selection committee, the individual’s future is decided by his ability to pointedly not be shy, in fact, to how well he opens mouth and interrupts with flawlessly worded and well-twanged witticisms. Your image could well lie in one impeccably-worded quote, suitable for repetition at future soirees.

The in-the-shadows status of the reticent has never before been so violently challenged. People Persons began to fill the world out of the nozzle of a garden hose pipe began with a bang in 1937, when the first edition of How to win Friends and Influence People pushed the shy guy over the edge by offering him a once in a lifetime chance to redeem himself and build what he never new he could acquire before: people skills. The phenomenon also built the foundation for that dreaded dilbertian human resources, and armed it with a fresh new tool with which to surely and definitely edge the shy guy sideways out of job opportunities, plum project presentations, and the best of future education. Where the shy guy persisted, training was used. ‘You can change’ it screamed at him, naturally and so perfunctorily assuming that the shy guy of course, would want to, in time leading him to believe in it himself. The beginnings of sitcoms, the superstardom of the laugh-a-minute scriptwriter, and television talk show hosts of the 80s and 90s piled on the pressure. A measure of this lies in the success of the king of talk show hosts himself; Jimmy Carson, self admittedly reticent, and nervously shy.

Unlike Carson, most shy people under such duress, more often than not, put their feet in it. An alumnus of Rishi Valley school, then in the 7th standard, described the newly admitted Rahul Gandhi, who had just joined the school after his father’s assassination, as painfully introverted, reclusive and sometimes, even a little lost. Rahul Gandhi’s by-now infamous remark on being PM has by now probably taken its toll. The well oiled party public relations machinery will have ensured that the little heir to the throne of India makes no such faux pas, and probably with a much updated version of a Carnegie-like precision, will ensure that the shy guy’s next public appearance is a well orchestrated stringing together of impeccable quotes. Rahul Gandhi on his way to being a People Person.

Where once the media obsessed over beauty alone, today beauty queens practice and are trained in the art of letting quotes slip. Looking good is now rarely enough. Sounding good and looking like you enjoy it all, is everything. Thus the co worker who mingles is seen as manager material as opposed to the diligent introvert.

The Philosophy of the People Persons has permeated neighbourhood focus groups, television serials, films, music, schools, colleges and work places. Children are prompted to sing, dance and think their way out of shyness. It is always cool to be part of the crowd, and to be the center of it is better. Where you have failed to achieve this are classes, seminars, workshops, to make you more confident, more vocal, more outgoing, and more gregarious. Soon, your life too, they promise, will be part of the glossy advertisement on the hoarding.

That’s not to say there is anything wrong with naturally being a People Person. The People Person per se is a fine phenomenon as long as he does not become hysterically infectious and a mandatory standard of judgement in place of talent, merit and thought.
There is probably a good reason why the top rung of Indian industry, from the famously reticent Ratan Tata whom skeptics vowed was not aggressive enough to lead the empire he inherited, to the world’s richest Indian Azim Premji, Infosys’ Narayan Murthy, who got his gal, and the billionaire Nandan Nilekani, are all inexplicably shy men. You just think the meek have still not inherited the earth. The shy guys prefer it that way.